Losing weight can cause a lot drama. Friends & family sometimes take a negative view on your weight loss. Part of it is their own jealousy/insecurities, you may be doing something that they've wanted to do for years. Sometimes it's not even about the weight loss itself, they're jealous of the fact that you set a goal and you're accomplishing it. That's not an easy thing to do and some people just can't stand that you have the dedication and follow-through they lack.
Then there are those who feel "you've changed, you're not the same person anymore". Well, in most cases, they're right! You're NOT the same person anymore! You've changed from the inside as well as out! I know that was the case for me! I found that once I began losing the weight, I had the confidence to do things I would have never done before. I didn't know it, but my weight had been holding me back from sharing the REAL ME with the rest of the world. The old Jonelle would have never started a blog or website on fitness & nutrition. She would have thought, "Who are you to think people want to hear what you have to say?", "You're no expert!" But the new, more confident Jonelle said, "I do have thoughts and opinions from my journey and experience with weight loss that I'm sure lots of people could benefit from." and this is why Confessions of a Fit Girl and Succeed At Fitness exist today.
Sometimes it's the people you've known the longest who have the hardest time accepting your change. They are just so used to the old you that they have a hard time excepting this new person. And that's just it, you may actually become an entirely different person in the process of losing weight, and as long as that person is a positive one, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.
It's not easy to lose friends, especially ones you've had for a long time, but as I said a long time ago, "It Takes Courage To Do This Thing"! No one ever promised you it would be easy. And if they did, I'm here to tell you that it's not! There are a lot of things you may have to go through while losing weight that have absolutely nothing to do with the actual weight. But think about it, if you can lose a "friend" that easily, is that person truly the type of "friend" you want in your life? And that person actually may be a good person, but you know that saying, "people are in your life for a reason, season or a lifetime"? Well, that person's reason & season may just be up! Hate to be so blunt, but you can't let other people's problems affect your positivity. And having a goal, sticking to it, working for it and achieving healthy results IS a positive thing!
So does losing weight = losing friends? Maybe. Is it still worth it? Well, let's see... fit body & mind, good health, improved self-esteem, more confidence, less stress... I'd say a big YES! Don't let others define your destiny! Stick to your goals! If you lose a few "friends" along the way, it's tough, but I'm sure with your new positive attitude and outlook on life, you'll have no problems picking up a few new ones along the way.
This can be a problem, but I try to keep positive people around me. It is such a shame when friends desert you for any type of success.
ReplyDeleteSadly, this can be true more often than not, but if it does happen, you have to remember the good times and cherish the memories and go on. Remember each person is brought into your life for a time, season and a purpose and when they aren't your friend anymore, well, your time together is at an end. But cherish the new person that you have become!
ReplyDeleteIt's totally an insecurity in them. Sad and unfortunate. Luckily Ive been able to inspire friends to follow in my footsteps. I think because they saw that my essence never changed - I didn't feel better than anybody else as is the case when some people who embark on a fitness journey become cocky and arrogant.
ReplyDeleteI would be so sad if this happened to me. I feel I'm lucky it hasn't. OTOH, before I lost my weight and turned to fitness, I had a real chip on my shoulder and felt like my fit friends (and family) were taunting me or "showing off" their fitness. I try to be conscious of that and try not to over-discuss it with people who aren't on the same path (yet).
ReplyDeleteWow I never heard of such a thing...so sad & doesn't make sense!
ReplyDeleteI agree that people can be envious of others - even the ones who are really close to them. Losing friends isn't necessarily a bad thing. It can also mean that they're not your true friends. But I agree that not letting others get you down can help you in the long run.
ReplyDeleteLauri Hersh